Tuesday, January 1, 2013

That's Why All The Fuss

As I type there are two girls sleeping, one in the bed, and one on the couch, and yet another one flipping through her camera with dozens of brilliant photos that this iPad leaves us no way of transferring from camera to computer, and I am beyond happy.  I spent the day missing them, watching Michigan lose a close Bowl game to a frustratingly annoying South Carolina, all the while pining for these three girls.  It was sickening...both the loss and the pining.

It's true what they say about love, you's worth it. That's why all the fuss.

Tonight I bathed Zo, while June slept with Mags. I read to Zo while June did her best to transition Mags from her chest to the pathetic laundry basket that we are using as a crib. I brushed away Zed's hair from her face when she woke herself from coughing and while June slipped away to get her something for her throat. I missed them even as I was here amongst them, that's how strong that love business is.

I wish I had photos to post.  I wish I had more to say. I'm just half-blissful in my oh-so indulgent absence from home. Perhaps not so strangely, I've realized that I really never left home, no, it came with me, as it's becoming remarkably clear that it is exactly wherever these three girls are. In fact, if I walked away from everything that I knew back home and just started over with what I have here and now I'd be ridiculously okay with that. It wouldn't be much of an effort.  I suppose that's what we all should be shooting for, isn't it? It sounds simple, but it feels pretty incredible to actually come to the conclusion in real time, and not just theory.  I've never quite thought of it that way. What if I just had to walk away, what if I just had to start over with what I had with me right's a remarkable realization...but a pretty comforting one. I'd miss you all very much...well, some of you...but I'd be just fine...more than fine. I'd be happy.

It's true what they say about love you know...


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