'Tis The Season...Almost

I'm so ridiculously excited for Christmas this year.  I mean, I am every year, but this year I'm nearly bursting and I have no idea why.  This year I'm going to relish the two week break, and I'm going to tackle Christmas oh-so selfishly.  So selfishly that it makes me laugh out loud.  We've got a family of four now, and Zoey is at a near perfect age for all this awesomeness.  I'm going to beg for visitors on Christmas Eve.  I'm going to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" uninterrupted that same night, what used to be a tradition at my good friend Gainey Bouman's house that I happily adopted for myself.  I'm going to wake up to the sound of an excited little girl, and we'll meander through family after that, and then almost immediately on the heals of that, we're leaving.  We're finding a place to daydream and squeal with laughter, and with luck tan our pale skin, or widen our tired eyes...south, or east to New York, better yet, West, back to San Clemente...who knows, but we're going.

I have a simple list of wants...a book or two, a new radio, just like the last...ahmm, so far that's about it. I do, however, have one big thing on my list.  I want everyone else to be excited...to be oh-so Christmasy...to embrace and embody the happiness of the season, to be a little geeky at teh prospect of Christmas.  Lately the people around me have seemed to have taken the holidays in stride...like they're no big thing, just another couple of days, which is an affront to anyone who embraces them as fervently as I.  For me it's not about the religiosity of the phenomenon...and it's not about gifts and present, although it is most definitely about giving.  It's about being happy, and hopeful, and excited...about remembering what it was like when you were a kid.  It should be the most loving time of year, and too often, at least more recently it feels as though it might be a small burden for people, a couple of days to enjoy, but mostly just get through, and that rips a giant hole in me.  I don't do well to surround myself with people who are less enthusiastic than me...I get bummed, I get upset that all of the little things that mean so much to me, mean nothing to anyone else.  Selfish?  Sure...but it the most hopeful kind of way.  If you can't muster excitement at Christmas, then you need to talk to someone.  It's the one day of the year when the calendar gives you full permission to be blissful.

Bliss for me this year means a Christmas Eve with sleeping children, presents already wrapped, a movie on the tv, maybe a surprise visit by friends, and something fun to eat and drink...a good sleep, and a fun waking...an excited Zoey, and an easy day of visiting.  Bliss for me this year means bliss for everyone, otherwise, it just won't be what it could be.