Science Schmience...Gimme a Blog
You can learn how to be a better parent in the oddest places. Here's what I learned after spending a few days with Canada's leading violence risk assessment and trauma response expert (such is my life these days).
If you don't know anything about Human Systems Theory, it's stellar stuff, it's a big chunk of what I do everyday but don't talk about because who wants to hear about human systems theory? No one, that's who. It can get stupid complicated, and most times I loath discussing it because frankly, I then have to listen to other people tell me their theories, but let me toss you a few curious cookies that I got to drink deeply from this week...
Someone has to rise up and lead a group of people, in your own family, it had better be one of the parents. It isn't always.
If a child isn't connected to a positive force that is filling them up with good information (uhmm, that's you, or it better be) then they'll fill up with other stuff...maybe bad stuff...probably bad stuff.
Almost everything occurs along a path of evolutionary development. Things don't "just happen"...it's next to impossible for things to simply "happen." So saying that you never saw something coming is probably true, but that's a lot different from there not being any signs.
The more positive connections and relationships a child has, the more people they have to disappoint. That's kind of a big deal.
There's something called parallel process and it sounds more complex than what it is...it goes something like this...Talk to your kids, I mean really talk, and they'll talk to you. Pretty simple. It's kinda like being attracted to people who are attracted to you.
Naturally open systems (families) have great leadership, great communication, great understanding, and great filters around them. Naturally open systems don't necessarily care what other people think, they do what's best for the system, and they do so genuinely. If you don't think that your family is a system then you're drunk off your a#$.
Most people don't fully understand everything that they're doing, but they do it anyway. Seriously...most people.
Since we're talking about "most people"...most people imitate behaviour, very few innovate. What's that mean? It means that whatever your son or daughter is doing, they've very likely seen it somewhere else.
When someone really wants to do something, when they're 100% committed...they do it. Most people aren't 100% committed to ideas, which means that there's room to influence and change.
If you don't deal with something, don't talk about it, and you let it fester it will begin to rot. You can't leave things unsaid and unacknowledged or you lose control and awareness of what they turn into, and they WILL turn into something.
Did you ever think that you could become a better parent by talking about Columbine and Taber etc...awful etc...? Well, you can, and part of our collective problem is that those aren't the things that we use to help us become better parents. We read blogs.
If you don't know anything about Human Systems Theory, it's stellar stuff, it's a big chunk of what I do everyday but don't talk about because who wants to hear about human systems theory? No one, that's who. It can get stupid complicated, and most times I loath discussing it because frankly, I then have to listen to other people tell me their theories, but let me toss you a few curious cookies that I got to drink deeply from this week...
Someone has to rise up and lead a group of people, in your own family, it had better be one of the parents. It isn't always.
If a child isn't connected to a positive force that is filling them up with good information (uhmm, that's you, or it better be) then they'll fill up with other stuff...maybe bad stuff...probably bad stuff.
Almost everything occurs along a path of evolutionary development. Things don't "just happen"...it's next to impossible for things to simply "happen." So saying that you never saw something coming is probably true, but that's a lot different from there not being any signs.
The more positive connections and relationships a child has, the more people they have to disappoint. That's kind of a big deal.
There's something called parallel process and it sounds more complex than what it is...it goes something like this...Talk to your kids, I mean really talk, and they'll talk to you. Pretty simple. It's kinda like being attracted to people who are attracted to you.
Naturally open systems (families) have great leadership, great communication, great understanding, and great filters around them. Naturally open systems don't necessarily care what other people think, they do what's best for the system, and they do so genuinely. If you don't think that your family is a system then you're drunk off your a#$.
Most people don't fully understand everything that they're doing, but they do it anyway. Seriously...most people.
Since we're talking about "most people"...most people imitate behaviour, very few innovate. What's that mean? It means that whatever your son or daughter is doing, they've very likely seen it somewhere else.
When someone really wants to do something, when they're 100% committed...they do it. Most people aren't 100% committed to ideas, which means that there's room to influence and change.
If you don't deal with something, don't talk about it, and you let it fester it will begin to rot. You can't leave things unsaid and unacknowledged or you lose control and awareness of what they turn into, and they WILL turn into something.
Did you ever think that you could become a better parent by talking about Columbine and Taber etc...awful etc...? Well, you can, and part of our collective problem is that those aren't the things that we use to help us become better parents. We read blogs.
posted by Unknown at
7:58 PM
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