Monday, September 26, 2011

An Office With a View.

I knew that there was a reason I stayed home this morning. I have no real place to go. It is a PD Day and I was unassigned to any specific task so I made my own. I have meetings arranged with people who might be able to help me and these kids in acute moments of need, but none between 8 and 9 AM, and none sitting at my kitchen table watching it rain. The windows are open, the rain is falling straight down in giant drops and the sky is not entirely grey and rain soaked. There is some blue...some sunshine way over the trees and somewhere I'm not. Zoey is waking up at Baachan's house. June is working. I am waiting for my day to unfold, and despite the prefect sense of calm and contentedness that the rain has brought, I kinda miss the chaos. And to be truthful, it's not all that chaotic. It's just busy, but a nice kind of busy. The kind of busy that makes you not want to do anything else. The rain is nice, but the little blond wonder that typically runs around here is nicer.

This morning I'll find purpose, and this afternoon I have to report to a school to find even more purpose, but for now I'll just sit here and miss my daughter, sip coffee, and wait for my day to fall together. I should probably remember this moment because there might not be one again for awhile. That's the trickery of this parenting deal, it trains you to be on the ready rather than encourage you to enjoy the moment.

I'm going to enjoy this one.

I hear the clock ticking, and the sound of wind whispering through the leaves outside is a heavier, thicker sound...weighed down by the heavy rain, and the last few weeks of green. It won't be long before the rain rips leaves from the branches, and the windows are no longer open. I think my coffee has gotten cold while I've typed and the rain has stopped. I keep waiting for a noise from Zo's room but none are coming, not for a few more hours and by then this day will be nearing done.

This is the best office I've ever kept. I can type away at work and then take breaks with Zoey's ukelele and a fresh cup of warm coffee. This day can't stay this good, can it?


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