First...I can't stop listening to Hanni El Khatib's "Dead Wrong."I love it more than lunch, and what a stellar video.
Second...don't mistake me for the Board of Directors type, as is the seemingly popular thing to do of late. No, I don't wish to second your motion for an approval of the budget. No, I couldn't care a whole lot less about your political agenda, and/or your direction, message, or purpose. I don't like the Executive Director types that dot the landscape of Boards...or the Treasurers, or the Secretaries...and while we sit and talk there are kids buying bad dope in the skate park from bad guys that all of us seemingly good guys don't have time for 'cause we're busy meeting. Yeah, count me out...but thanks random unnamed university, and mucho gracias random unnamed criminal rehabilitation organization, but I won't be your token young man, or your pipeline to what's actually happening on the street. I won't be your access to the schools, or your familiar face in the jails...nope. Get your suits dry cleaned, and make motions for the approval of meeting minutes, but don't use me in such a blatantly offensive way. There might be tattoos on my arms and an innocence in my demeanor but I know what I'm doing, and what I'm doing isn't joining your ranks.
Third...we're going to the Zoo this Monday and I could $#!% my pants I'm so excited (also one more reason why I can't be on your Board of Directors...I like to talk like that).
Fourth...I don't really have a fourth thing. I learned today that old people steal cheese. Swear to Jebus. There's something for you.
Lastly, tonight my daughter ate spaghetti with her bare hands like she'd never eaten a morsel of food before in her life...like a caveman, except, you know, a cavewoman. It was hilarious. Just jammed fistful after fistful of noodles into her gaping chompers.
Oh, and one other thing...this is the cutest kid I may have ever seen in my life.