Ahmm, CNN...they're called Provinces, very similar to your States, and this awful storm, the one that's turned the region literally 45 minutes away from Detroit, MI and approximately two f#$%king feet from your border, into a State of Emergency, is happening IN Ontario...not near Ontario...IN Ontario, you fools.

Do people really trust you to bring them the news? It's not like the 402 Hwy is a side road in the Yukon...it extends directly from the US border into Canada's southernmost, most populous Province all the way to Toronto, this nation's largest city...you know, that city with MLB, NBA, and NHL franchises...and by the looks of it, you got the footage from your affiliate station here in Detroit, WXYZ. People in Detroit aren't ignorant of Canadiana, in fact, everyone in Southeastern Michigan feels more like family than foreigners...but Atlanta, you guys are out to lunch. Where is Atlanta anyway? Somewhere near Georgia, right? Unbelievable.

I typically spend a lot of time correcting people who tell giant fibs about how every American thinks that us Canadians grow up in igloos and that you can ski all summer long as soon as you cross the border...that's just flat stupid and not true and I defend your nation endlessly, telling those fools that such stories are just ignorant and perpetuate an untrue, unfair stereotype of Americans...but near Ontario....really CNN? C'mon. Apparently I grew up near Ontario my whole life, but not in it, I guess. I wonder what that makes me? Maybe smarter than the guy doing on-air graphics for CNN broadcasts. That intern just got fired.

In the meantime, here are some other, better oriented news sources. We're in a State of Emergency here...kinda crazy. We're safe, and happy, and watching Toy Story for the fiftieth time.

Detroit News story.

Toronto Star story.

CBC Story.

NY Times Story.