The Zoey Blog: The impending doom of day...and Zoey's indifference. FINAL - COVER UNIVERSE EXPLORERS ORDER

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

The impending doom of day...and Zoey's indifference.

Absolutely nothing good can come of blogging at 7 am...nothing. First, I'm essentially sleep-blogging with almost no comprehension of what's coming out of my head. Second, when the better part of your day is preceded by irrelevant cyber-babble it really doesn't set a good precedent. If you're going to do anything at 6am it should be something more productive than aimless meandering. RIght now I'm typing with absolutely no direction and very little concern for integrity or entertainment.

Today is a semi-big day, which leads to me to believe that if you can refer to a day as a "semi-big day" then it's probably not. Got a Federal audit type visit from a Federal audit type lady first thing this morning. Thank God it's in the AM that way I can get back to my day sucking before lunch.

Zoey's sleeping peacefully on her mother's chest right now with no concept of the sucky day ahead. She woke up at 6:30 am and June slipped off to comfort her back into hibernation using an efficient combo of soothing voice, rocking motion and boobie. That never happens to me. I just wake up, have to pee and then I start my day. Who's the lucky one here. Sure she shits herself but c'mon...this is some pretty easy math. There's no Federal audit in Zoey's near future. She's gonna awake up smile, like she always does, then she's going eat a little, then play, and then eat some more. Eventually she'll take a nap, and watch some Sesame Street. I think she may even be going shopping today. Are you kidding me? If you told me that all I had to do to earn that day was sit in my own excrement for an hour I'd sign up seven times.

Instead, today I get to entertain Mrs, Audit and then maybe if I'm lucky I'll hear about how little #$%& steals his Dad's medical marijuana but can't stand living at home because they don't understand him, and at 14 he'd like to move out. Aside from the crapping himself part I don't think little #$%&'s life is all that much different from Zoey's so someone needs a talking to about the intricacies of living.

I'm not complaining, don't get me wrong, I love my life and my job...I'm just using humor and irony and perhaps a little avoidance so that I don't have to get out bed. Unfortunately, I have to pee and that's where the whole day starts to slip downhill. Oh well, no worries...I'm not ridding the world of cancer, just assholes. It's an uphill fight so I'd better select appropriate footwear today.

Hello if you'll excuse me I'd like to start the day by ridding my body of excess fluids. Some informative blog post huh? See what I mean about blogging at 7 am?


Post a Comment

Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]

<< Home